★☆☆☆☆
“Accurate test. He is still here. It has been six weeks.”
Reproductive Wellness
MAGA Pregnancy Test™
A third party is now involved.
$29.76
Ships in 3–5 business days from a warehouse that does not exist.
The moment of truth should not be faced alone. Within 90 seconds of use, MAGA Pregnancy Test™ summons a duly elected member of your state legislature to your bathroom to walk you through your options, of which there are fewer than you assumed.
Two lines: pregnant. One line: also pregnant, pending review. No lines: the legislator will still arrive.
ParodyNot for saleNot medical advice
Drug Facts
Active ingredientPurpose
hCG antibody strip, 25 mIU/mL; one (1) state legislatorResult delivery and unsolicited counsel
Uses
- Detects pregnancy
- Detects the absence of pregnancy, then legislates about it anyway
Warnings
- Legislator is not a medical professional and will say so proudly.
- In some states, several legislators appear. In others, a legislature.
- Legislator cannot be dismissed, muted, or reasoned with. Legislator may run for higher office in your bathroom.
Directions
- Remove test from wrapper.
- Apply urine to absorbent tip for 5 seconds.
- Lay flat. Wait 90 seconds. Unlock the door — it saves time.
Other information
Legislator does not require batteries and will not leave.
Questions? There is no number to call. This panel is a parody of the FDA Drug Facts label. Nothing described here exists, and nothing here is medical advice.
Verified* Reviews
*Not verified. Not reviews. Not real people.